July 26, 2007

Laugh if you will…

So I’ll probably lose the respect of most of you by admitting this, but what the heck. Sarah and I are on a bad-movie spree of late (ie, deliberately watching movies that we know are bad – Cool as Ice, Guyver, House 2, etc). So the other night we watched Aeon Flux (and yes, that’s an actual still from the movie). No, not the so-cool-it-makes-your-eyes-bleed animated version that was on MTV (and which, it’s worth pointing out, I never saw). We watched the universally-loathed live-action movie version. And I liked it quite a bit, as did Sarah. We were pretty disconcerted by this turn of events, so I hit the internet to find out why people hated it so much. Here are the reasons I found:
1. It’s not as cool as the cartoon/plot is totally different. I can’t respond to this, because I never saw an entire episode of the cartoon, but I do sympathize, at least in theory.
2. Aeon doesn’t wear a virtually nonexistent swimsuit type outfit. Once again, I can understand, but if they’d put a live actress in the outfits that the cartoon wore, the movie would be NC-17 in a hurry.
3. The acting sucks. Well, honestly, this isn’t freaking King Lear. It’s basically a story about super-powered cloned people trying to murder each other with exotic weapons. So, really, mostly the acting needs to consist of looking lethal and/or hot, and managing to mouth your lines while keeping a straight face. And hey, it has the guy who played Kaiser Susse in The Usual Suspects, wearing what appears to be a giant, inverted cloth bucket.
4. The sets look they came from an ad in Dwell (ok, I made up this one, but it’s true). I actually thought the primary colors/Ikea look added to the atmosphere of the movie nicely, but it was pretty over the top.

Where am I going with all this? I’m not really sure, given that I doubt any of the bike geeks reading this are going to rush out and rent Aeon Flux, and if you did, you’d probably hate it, just like everyone else on the planet.

Bike-related post tomorrow, I promise.